the trouble with love

there's this girl i know, today i talked to her online and she told me her story today about her love life. i feel really sad for her, she's in a love triangle. damn those love triangles. my best friend was in one, i think he's still in one, for most part of the reason i think he'll always be in one. i've seen it's affects on him and can kinda imagine what kind of pain this girl must be harvesting on the inside. as everyone reading my blog by now would know even i'm going thru the pain of love. there's absolutely no aneasthetic for that pain. and it will come to a point where death seems to be a better idea. oh trust me, i've been there far to many times in the last five months. to be honest the idea hasn't left my head yet, it's still stored in one corner. love has that starnge affect on us, when you're in love it's just indescribeable, there's no word to even come close to explain it. it's just a phenomena. it's....oh i can just go on and on.

but be honest, why do we do this to ourselves. why do we fall in love and think it's next to godlyness and then when it's gone, bitch about it, and punish ourselves like it was one big horrible period in our lives. i had burn marks, sorry still have burn marks on my right forearm. everytime i wanted to call her i burnt myself just to divert my attention on the pain. i had stripes on my hand, looked like a damn love sick tiger. but why do we do it? i had and uncle who committed suicide for love. when my mom told me about his life story and how he did what he did, i told my mom he was a coward. today, i stand corrected. he's not a coward, he was just one brave man who didn't want to be healed. we feel pain and death is more tolerable than losing our love ones. is this why we swear it "till death do us part"? the things we learn and the way we grow from and after being in love, does it make us a better person, or does it make us more complicated.....

so, does love suck, or is it still next to godlyness?

this girl i know is giving up the man she loves and the man who loves her, just because she thinks it wont go anywhere. because she thinks it'll only get worst. but what if it doesn't go sour, what if it becomes one of those relationships you only read about in books, the kind you see in movies. what if? isn't love all about hope? hope for a better life, hope for a new beginning, hope for a romantic, passionate, sexual, warmth, birth, life....i can go on and on. it is hope isn't it...like i said before it's devine, heavenly, and beyond this world...

so to answer my question, yes. yes, it is next to godlyness.

"Will you have this woman as your lawful wedded wife, to live together in the estate of matrimony? Will you love her, honor her, comfort her, and keep her in sickness and in health; forsaking all others, be true to her as long as you both shall live? (I will). As my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

think about it...the trouble with love.